etoilegalaxyfandomcom-20200215-history
Sujet Ramisk
Sujet Ramisk is a male Pacahtuk pilot and freightman who often finds himself helping his friends in messy battle situations, despite his aloof mentality and complete lack of combat training. Sujet was born on April 1st, 2998 in a middle-class neighborhood in the city of Artesian Fountain on his species' home planet of Muladoon. His family consists of an engineer father, a homemaker mother, and 5 siblings; him being the older-middle (3rd) child of the 6 children. Personality His personality is that of cheerful absent-mindedness, which can be enraging to those unaccustomed to such a thing. Despite this, he's not stupid in terms of knowledge (though it can seem so during the more major bouts of the condition). He is extremely good with electronics, and is obsessed with food, media and popular culture, and various mundane things. He is one of the few people who has managed to irritate the galactic murderer Mrkos Brorsen and survive, even to the point of inducing migraines in the madman. Appearance Sujet is about 6'2" and of slim build. The latter fact torments him regularly, as his desired occupation is that of a sumo wrestler. He usually wears a plain t-shirt, light jacket, blue jeans, and black backpack, but can sometimes be seen wearing oddities like an old-fashioned tricorner hat with a waffle trinket. History Sujet was in and out of odd jobs since he was 16, never bothering with college. He had always pined for a career as a sumo wrestler, but his hyperactivity and metabolism kept him far from it, no matter how much he ate; and his aloof mentality prevented him from considering that he probably just needed to calm down. His primary income was from repairing electrical systems. This eventually allowed him to buy his first jumpspace-capable starship, a blue and green 1FP Valyra-class heavy fighter/light freighter. With that, he started a personal shipping business, and this took him to various corners of the galaxy for over a decade. One day, he decided that he was bored with shipping and wanted to do other things. He sold the Valyra and bought something more updated, a 1FP Sprintkill-class patrol ship that he called the Noopen. It is suspiciously well-armed, despite his non-military background. It is likely that he was completely unaware of this when he bought it. Current Activity For reasons unknown, Sujet has become an unwitting accomplice of Andross as of 3038. He gleefully collaborates on projects with the ape, fully convinced of Andross' benevolence. Anomalous Effects Sujet is an atypical Pacahtuk, in the sense that certain researchers consider him to be a metaphysical anomaly. Through some unknown means, Sujet's presence does not meld well with the laws of physics. Some anomalous effects may occasionally manifest around him, assumed to be the result of space-time "glitching out." The following list details some of the more consistent anomalies, listed according to the severity of their hazardous effects: Benign Anomaly Translocation: Sujet may randomly vanish or appear at any given point at any time. This is usually in the presence of groups of people who are performing an activity he would consider interesting. He has also been known to appear in restaurants. He does not seem to be aware of this ability. Moderate Anomalies Eldritch Voice: Sujet’s inherent silliness has turned his voice into a legitimate cognitohazard. There is a small chance that a random foe will go insane just by hearing Sujet talk (which he does often), gaining disadvantage on attacks for a short period of time. A foe must have decent willpower to avoid insanity. Sujet can focus on this quirk (e.g. yammering about nonsense), and the foe will likely go mad. Absurdity Never Dies: If Sujet is seriously wounded (or outright dies), there is a chance that he will instantly and mysteriously vanish from the fight and respawn later in a random location nearby, healed somewhat. He may or may not remember what he was doing and either get back in the fight or be out for the rest of the fight, having been distracted by something more interesting. Probably food. The Un-Stealth: Imagine a bull in a china shop, and it has a dozen boomboxes strapped to it blaring the heaviest pirate metal music you’ve ever heard at earsplitting volume. Sujet is the bane of ANY stealth mission. If he is with you on a sensitive mission that requires sneaking, YOU WILL FAIL, and will also probably die in a very embarrassing and entirely preventable way. Putting a number to his metaphorical stealth debuff would be like trying to calculate the credit score of Bill Gates. It’s a moot point. * It is marginally possible to subdue Sujet and carry him through a sensitive area as though he was a piece of equipment. This will require 3 players to each roll a D20 die twice (total of 6 rolls), and each result must be 15 or above. 2 players will need to carry him, and 1 player will need to keep BOTH hands clamped around his snout. Greater Anomaly Fountain of Madness: Once or twice per day, Sujet bursts into frantic laughter. For several minutes, the magnitude of his laughter makes him vibrate and blur, making it very difficult to carry out any physical interactions with him. He cannot interact while doing this. If in a battle, this odd, comedic levity boosts the confidence of allies within 50m, while enemies within 50m see this as brazen mockery. Allies gain a bonus to all attacks, while enemies are so genuinely offended that they cannot focus properly and get a debuff (though they can avoid this by having great willpower). This may cause Sujet to become a target… if they can hit him. OOC Sujet's presence in Etoile is very cartoony in nature. He serves as a bumbling comedic relief and acts as a running gag of sorts. Sujet-Related Quotes 1st Mrkos Convo Here is the transcript of the first conversation he had with Mrkos Brorsen over comms: Mrkos: Haha! I'm evil! Die everyone! Sujet Ramisk: Well that's not nice. Mrkos: Well no... I'm evil. Sujet Ramisk: So you are not good. Mrkos: Exactly. I am a bully. Sujet Ramisk: Oooo, bologna? Mrkos: No... bully. BULLY. Sujet Ramisk: What's that taste like? Mrkos: [pause] What? No... no... BULLY is a word to describe a bad person who enjoys causing people pain. Sujet Ramisk: Ohhhh. Well that's not very nice. Mrkos: Right. Sujet Ramisk: Don't you mean wrong? Mrkos: [pause] What's your name? Sujet Ramisk: Sujet. Mrkos: Sujet. Okay... good. Where do you live? Sujet Ramisk: Ha, I can't tell you that! You're a stranger, and strangers spoil all the surprises! Mrkos: Oh no no, strangers give many surprises. Take me for example. Sujet Ramisk: Take you... for example? How can I take you to one? Mrkos: [audible facepalm] The main point is: I am evil. I will kill you and everyone you love. Sujet Ramisk: Gasp! Does that mean everyTHING I love, too? Mrkos: YES. If you are dead, then technically, everything you love would... not be everything you love. Because you'd be too dead to love it anymore. Sujet Ramisk: ...Well that's not very nice. Mrkos: No, no it isn't... ow... what was that... Sujet Ramisk: What was what? Me talking? Mrkos: Probably, and the stupidity is killing me. Sujet Ramisk: If you're that stupid, go to college. Mrkos: NO, THAT... that... I have a headache now. A major headache. Your words actually physically hurt me. Sujet Ramisk: Why? Mrkos: Because your lack of intelligence is causing me substantial annoyance. Sujet Ramisk: Substantial enjoyment? Well, I'll keep talking then! Now what was it that you were saying about bologna? Mrkos: Let it be known: I have promoted you to the upper ranks of my list of people to kill. I said NOTHING about bologna. NOTHING. Sujet Ramisk: Oh! You said you were a bologna! Why would you say that? I didn't think bologna could talk! Do... do you taste good? Mrkos: I... wow... what are you? Sujet Ramisk: A Pacahtuk. What kind of bologna are you? Mrkos: Oh goodness, I think I've found the dumbest person in the region. Sujet Ramisk: Oh really? Where? Mrkos: [audibly louder facepalm] Sujet Ramisk: What was that? Mrkos: Self injury. Sujet Ramisk: Did it hurt? I heard bologna can bruise easily. Mrkos: OH LOOK, ICE CREAM! Sujet Ramisk: WHERE?! I LIKE ICE CREAM. Mrkos: In the closet! Go get it! Sujet Ramisk: Y-... waiiiit, why would ice cream be in the closet? Mrkos: Wow, I actually thought that would work. Sujet Ramisk: Ice cream can't work, silly! It's a food, not a person! Mrkos: I'm shutting off my comm now. Don't expect to hear from me. Do not reply to me if you hear my voice. I do not exist. Sujet Ramisk: Well it sounds like you need some ice cream, angry nonexistent bologna guy. Once you've cooled off, go to one of the colleges to cure that stupidity of yours, okay? Mrkos: [hostile grunt, disconnection click] Category:Characters Category:Characters of Jerionis Kanik Category:Cognitohazards